Dear Gemma, Been thinking a lot about your family regularly. And I only found out about your father‘s passing. He was a very very sweet man to me. Just feel compelled to communicate why Carole is still so relevant to me. It was because of our commonality with the epilepsy- it ran so deep. And like you, I have days of uncontrollable tears normally sparked by certain music or sad films. Ian Curtis who is the lead singer of Joy Division had severe epilepsy and Carole and I loved the band. Atmospheres was probably the best song ever to us. We also loved the sisters of Mercy by Leonard Cohen and satellite of love by Lou Reed-all sweet songs. you’re very brave woman and I know your family will mean so much more to you! I wasn’t with Carole for those last months but in hindsight I’m so glad she took off and had those experiences and saw things and did things; just wish she’d had time to look back at them. Also had taken more photographs. I don’t know why I’m telling you this because you know it already she was a very spiky sometimes but that was to protect her very sensitive inside. She was a very funny eccentric girl with a big smile for everybody always. I miss her so much every day and though I’ve met people since, nobody has come close to your sister. I don’t know why I’m telling you this. Perhaps there’s been a little bit more acceptance. I wish you and your mum, your little ones and Dan all my very kind Best wishes. I just had some Saturday morning thoughts whilst the radio was on and felt compelled to communicate to you. Ben x.